Getting Divorced Due to Micro-Cheating

Micro-cheating Entails Subtle Behaviors Suggesting Emotional Attachment Outside of Marriage, Although it Often Fails to Meet the Standard for Traditional Cheating.

Micro-cheating is a concept that has come onto the scene in recent decades, especially as the generation who was raised on social media marries. Micro-cheating refers to behaviors and activities that cannot be explicitly called out as infidelity in marriage but that point to emotional attachment to another. Many times, these behaviors happen online through direct messaging, incessantly liking another’s content, or commenting inappropriately.

If you believe your spouse may be cheating, but you can only prove instances of micro-cheating through social media activity, contact The Montanari Law Group for a free and confidential consultation to discuss whether you may have grounds for at-fault divorce due to adultery. There are many nuances to micro-cheating that can render it admissible or not in the New Jersey family court of divorce as evidence of infidelity; even then, evidence of infidelity — or adultery — leading to an at-fault divorce does not always impact its legal outcome, the equitable distribution of marital assets, or child custody. A qualified divorce attorney at our family law firm can help you develop your argument and move forward with a successful at-fault divorce or a divorce based on irreconcilable differences.

Can Social Media Micro-Cheating Affect Your NJ Divorce?

According to New Jersey law, infidelity is the sharing of a personally intimate relationship with someone outside of the marriage or being otherwise unfaithful. Adultery is engaging in consensual sexual relations. Neither is illegal in New Jersey. Micro-cheating often points to — or is on its own — emotional or physical infidelity in marriage. Micro-cheating can take many forms, from sending private messages to a “friend” in which intimate topics of conversation are discussed to engaging regularly with another’s social media posts and commenting using cheeky language, to countless other examples. But can evidence of these subtle and seemingly innocent forms of sharing emotional intimacy with another (and potentially revealing a behind-the-scenes physical relationship with them) be used in family court to affect the outcome of a divorce? Even as examples of micro-cheating can be compiled with other evidence to prove adultery and thus contribute to grounds for an at-fault divorce, it does not always impact the divorce’s outcome in terms of who gets what. In order for equitable distribution of assets, child custody, or spousal support to be affected due to a partner’s emotional or physical infidelity, including examples of micro-cheating, one must prove that the infidelity involved additional damaging behavior. This could include the use of marital assets to finance an affair, involvement with an individual who is a dangerous influence on the married couple’s children, or other behaviors that reveal the cheating spouse’s untrustworthy character.

Micro-Cheating and the Path Forward

If you find out your spouse is micro-cheating, it does not mean that the relationship will definitely end in divorce. There are ways to re-establish trust, an essential facet of any relationship and the first thing to go when one spouse engages emotionally with someone outside of the marriage. First, open up the lines of communication. Let your spouse know you see their behavior and are concerned about their emotional commitment to the relationship. Communicate your expectations regarding the relationship, and set clear boundaries regarding what types of relationships you consider fair and appropriate and will allow.

Make sure you are listening, too. Prompt your partner for areas in which they don’t feel emotionally or sexually satisfied in the relationship that may be driving them to meet those needs elsewhere, and be open to changing your approach to the relationship when you learn about your blind spots. Seek the professional support of a couples therapist for guidance on how to implement those changes. And if divorce has already been deemed the path forward, consider consulting with an attorney for advice on how to move forward with an amicable divorce instead of a potentially conflict-ridden one.

Our Divorce Attorneys Can Help You Deal with Marital Dissolution After Micro Cheating in New Jersey

Our family law attorneys at The Montanari Law Group provide quality legal counsel that can support couples at all stages of divorce. Where evidence of micro-cheating is involved, our divorce lawyers will help you determine whether your spouse’s behaviors constitute a wider case for adultery, particularly one whose actions speak to grounds for a fault-based divorce.

Our team is experienced in successfully representing our divorcing clients in Nutley, Haledon, Livingston, Totowa, Montclair, Ridgewood, Essex Fells, and elsewhere in Northern New Jersey in their at-fault divorces, where evidence of micro-cheating played a part in getting them a favorable outcome in the divorce. Contact us today at (973) 233-4396 for a free and confidential consultation to discuss your case.